Healed from an eating disorder
This text is in three parts
– Lauren’s cry
– her letter
– her testimony
A cry has nothing to do with a nice, politically correct prayer, the kind you can brag about in church. No, you spit it out from your guts. And it’s a good thing too, coz’ it’s you God cares about, not any kind of religious bows (He’s no gym teacher!). Besides,’good manners’ are the worst insult to sincerity.
If I’m sharing Lauren’s letter with you (with her authorization), it’s because I believe her testimony will help some of you.
Jesus answered Lauren’s cry one way. He might answer yours differently, but it will always be with love. Because, since He opened heaven’s door, your cries to Him are heard in high places.
It’s Lauren :)
I get your newsletter by mail and each time, it brightens up my day.
I seize this opportunity to tell you how much Spyke’s story moved me. https://www.auderset.com/en/blog/spyke-est-parti
THANK YOU so much for sharing with us these tough moments you faced.
The first (and one time) I wrote to you was in March of this year. I was telling you how “lonely” in my faith I was feeling. So, as you suggested, I contacted G. and that was …awesome! Such a simple and warm person, and his family as well. I also met a couple of people from the church.
On September 5th, I was baptized. What a memorable day, so full of joy! In short, I am happy! So happy to have met Jesus and to be able to live all this with Him.
On this occasion, I prepared a small testimony I’m attaching to this mail.
See you soon, Alain.
Life is good
My name is Lauren. I was born to a family that lacked nothing. Brought up with love, support and financial security, I was a well-educated diligent girl and a dreamer above all. Because of our education and our Catholic upbringing, I was aware of God but he was by no means first in my life.
Life was good. I was a good student, gifted with artistic talents (in singing and dancing), and boys showed appreciation. In other words, as one of my friends put it, my life was that of a princess with not a cloud in sight. I really had nothing to complain about.
At 15, at adolescence, tables turned. The sweet and smiling little girl I was, became a rebellious and more or less depressive youngster. (Not so) petty criticisms about my looks made me feel bad about myself and about my body. I started losing self-confidence and self-esteem and no longer loved myself. The only thing that comforted me was food, but I very soon started controlling my diet in order to lose weight. I hadn’t realized what door I was opening and how this kilo hunt was leading me into a game very hard to quit. Restrictions and frustrations made me compensate and I would automatically regain the weight I had lost, if not more. The perfectionist I was couldn’t cope with all the fails in this race all about weight and looks. I was wearing myself out. This yo-yo dieting lasted until I was 23.
One night, one of the many times I binge ate, I couldn’t get up from the couch anymore and I was feeling really bad. My stomach hurt so much. It was unbearable.
I was only able to cry out: JESUS!
Psalm 18 :6 (NIV) “In my distress, I called to the Lord; I cried to my God for help. From his temple, he heard my voice, my cry came before him, into his ears.”
That night something changed. Straight after my cry for help, indescribable peace came over me, taking away all stomach pain. Someone had met my grief.
In spite of this first sign, my eating habits quickly caught up with me, ensnaring me in the same patterns all over again; there was a difference, however.
My will to overcome this was strong! I started opening the word of God (the Bible) and I’d pray when things got too bad, hoping He’d have the time to listen to me.
But I rapidly turned to other methods that seemed more “efficient” to me. I started with a food balance program in order to manage my intake. Then, I underwent behavioral therapy to address my lack of self-confidence and self-esteem. Another therapy went back to what I could’ve experienced in my mother’s womb that could be impacting my present life. Then, I tried another more “energy focused” approach, based on the belief that my energy supply was being drained by some toxic relationships I had. I wanted to heal from these eating disorders so badly that I ended up following a couple of hypnosis sessions. Long story short, none of these methods ever healed me. They did temporarily relieve me but at what cost? The relapses would cause even more pain.
Every time, I thought I had found THE solution that would free me from this living hell. But it was all in vain, nothing but mist, a chase after the wind (Ecclesiaste 4:16)
Falling for Jesus
A year ago, driven by the Holy Spirit, I cried out for the second time and a spiritual authority stood up against my 13 years of eating disorder to save, free and heal me!
2 Thessalonians 3.3 “The Lord is faithful, and He will protect you from the evil one”
Since then, Jesus has been with me every day, through thick and thin. He is #1 in my life, at last. He is my friend, my confidant, He is the ONLY person never too busy to listen to me.
I gave Him my life and was baptized to show Him how much I loved Him and wanted to follow Him all the way.
Jesus still heals today.
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